Forgiveness (part 1)
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Jesus said to his disciples:
“To you who hear I say, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you,
bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.
Luke 6:27-28
I don't know who needs to hear this…but this week I feel compelled to talk about forgiveness. (part 1 of 2)
The Catholic Dictionary by Fr. Hardon defines forgiveness as “pardon or remission of an offense.”
I think as Catholics, we often think about forgiveness as something we need (and hope we receive) from God. As we should, because we do need it! We are called to repentance and when we do, God's Divine Mercy and forgiveness is unfathomable!
But today I want to talk about our own forgiveness to others.
Maybe that means forgiving for something big. Or maybe it is just for little annoyances or irritations. No matter how big or small, we're always called to forgive. But it isn't always easy, is it?
And are we forgiving others the way God calls us to?
Recently, I was listening to a homily about how we're called to forgive each other. For many years - whenever I heard this message - I would think: “Oh, I'm good. This doesn't apply to me! I'm not angry with anyone.”
But this last time, the message struck me differently. Probably I was just finally humble enough to hear it! 😬
I realized that forgiving is not just about "not being mad” at someone. It's about REALLY letting go and moving on.
Truly granting pardon - and then loving that person, wanting the best for them (probably the hardest part!). In the Gospel this past Sunday, Jesus says:
Forgive and you will be forgiven. Give, and gifts will be given to you; a good measure, packed together, shaken down, and overflowing, will be poured into your lap. For the measure with which you measure will in return be measured out to you.
Luke 6:37-38
Sometimes I think I've forgiven, but I'm still holding on to that little bit of offense or resentment. THIS is what I realized I needed to work on. Maybe you need to also?
I tend to live by the old saying “forgive but not forget.” I've forgiven them (technically), but I'm going to protect myself by not forgetting. Which in part is not a problem - certainly in some situations we need to be smart and keep ourselves and loved ones safe.
But in my situations, I think I'm hiding behind the “protect myself by not forgetting.” It's too easy to not do the hard work of REALLY forgiving.
Remember the Gospel: Forgive and you will be forgiven.
Am I forgiving the way I want God to forgive me? Are you?
(I already have 2 people in mind😐)
Ultimately, I think the answer is:
- acknowledge we often need help moving on
- PRAY - ask Him to help heal your heart and pray for the one you're struggling with
I've personally had my heart changed towards people that I have (sometimes grudgingly) prayed for.
Give it over to God, pray for your person (or people!), and ask God to help you truly forgive and love.
Then we will be giving a good measure which will in return be given to us.😇
My encouragement for you (and me!) to seek the sacred this week:
- Spend a little bit of time thinking about who you may need to truly forgive. Here's some questions to help:
- Am I holding onto some resentment for a past hurt?
- Have my feelings toward a certain person changed since they hurt me? Do I think about them differently?
- Is God calling me to change my attitude or actions toward someone? Should I be praying for them?
- Pray the Divine Mercy chaplet (see below). Ask God for the strength and grace to be merciful to specific people you struggle with, as He is merciful to us.
Next week in part 2, I'll talk about the part that leads to needing to forgive - being offended😬
Thoughts? Comments? Let me know!
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